been really tired these few days.
and i mean like seriously exhausted kind of tiredness.
okay, im totally complaining again. >(
Father Lord, i really need your strength.
i need you strength once again, i cant go on without you by my side.

A.R. Bernard services was fab (:
once again, he totally brought a word in season.
really felt challenged to rise up even more and not stay stagnant.
i think that, deep inside me i already know what is it that has to be done.
but im procastinating again, and letting the carnal flesh take over.
stupid carnal flesh. i bind you in Jesus' name! ROARAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

chingay pracs and history plays and other committments are totally taking up my time.
i need strength! i need strength!
God, send your angels down and lift me up!
i need your strength more than ever before now, everyday of my life, every second.
i dont like feeling angry or flaring at people.
i dont like to be cranky.
i dont wanna be someone that people shuns away cos people really hates angry people :(
i cant stand rejection, honestly.
but confidence was never something that i'll compromise on. :D
need to work on my anger managemnet factor though. manx ):

phyically tired, but i dont want to be spiritually tired either.

Os results are out today!
had to sit in the hall for an hour and listen to the principal droning on about the mean scores, percentage of passes and how our future was so dang important.
ngee ann poly and singapore poly came and talked about their courses too!
cool, i wanna take biomedical science if i get 11 points.
of course, im always aiming for ACJC (:
7 points to get into Science stream.
whoooooooooo. :D

dont wanna procastinate anymore.
have to get it in my brain that its less than 300 days to Os (10th oct, OMG!)
and i must start doing my homework!
i am seriously leaving my homework to the last minute.
very, very bad idea ):
slept yesterday at THREE AM can. and had to wake up 620 the next morning.
went to school looking like some zombie.
but ohhhhhhhhhhh! HAHAHA, DIANA MET HER JC TEACHER!
720 lrt train everyday eh, diana! :D
now i know why you wanna go school late.
hurhurhur.

okay.
that reminds me.
since i have to stop procastinating right, i totally have to stop watching Coffee Prince.
OMG, ITS SO DANG NICE PLEASEEEEEE. (:
the guy is hot. HAHA.
oh that reminds me again!
havent seen esther or laura or pj in a really long time.
hah. come to think of it, i havent seen lizzie and caleb too.
aiya. i miss all of them okay. ):
even since i stopped going to sat svc, i dont see them anymore.
cant talk to them face to face.
only on like MSN or something.
rubbish man, i wish i could just go for sat svc at expo.

oh yeah, ESTHER'S BIRTHDAY TMRW!
(finally sixteen eh! :DDD)
kay, gonna take a break from blogging i think.
until i have more time that is (:
ciao.

its 12AM in the morning.
just came back from chingay prac.
im feeling damn pissed.
projects and homework not done.
rushing the stupid bio project now.
2 SBQS due tmrw, plus 1 eng essay.

and its freaking 12AM!
IM SUPPOSED TO BE IN BED DANG IT!

oh, and Os results are out tmrw.
or rather, today.
best of luck people.

Head over Heels (In this Life) - Switchfoot

Head over here and take me
Head over heels and aching
When I told you I was yours
I was yours

In this life, you’re the one place I call home
In this life, you’re the feeling I belong
In this life, you’re the flower and the thorn
You’re everything that’s fair in love and war

I’m coming down like a gunshot
In all these battles I’ve fought
You’re the mark I’m aiming for
I was yours
Head over heels

In this life I’m stubborn to the core
In this life I’ve been burning after more
We both know what these open arms are for
You’re everything that’s fair

In this life, you’re my only one

alright lah.
i have a confession okay.
i still think of him, happy?
the end.
(if that actually makes you happy if i said it out loud) -____-
i dont see the point of it, seriously.

amath test today was so-so la. haa.
first page can do, then second page got stuck.
dang, but i have 12 marks arld (thats like a pass alrady okay!)
:D soooo, im happy (:
actually, if i look at it carefully, im quite smart.
really really, im not going all ego talk now.
hahahha :D even my mom says it okay.
just that.. laziness and procastination starts setting in, and well.
thats how i ended in Zhenghua when PHPPS produces other finer students that go to Nanhua, Fmss and Nanyang.
which i could have gotten in if i at least TRIED to study.
LOL.
butttttttttttttttt, no use saying that now, im gonna concentrate on Os and go to a fabb JC (:
study study study! (nerding)

gotta go fill up my goal setting card.
been putting it off for too long uh.
>( i dont want to fail to plan, cos i'll be planning to fail.
oh wells.

joey asked what i wanted for my birthday today.
HAHA.
i told her to look at my wishlist.
hmm, i wonder if she's reading this now.
anyways, whatever she gets me i'll be happy luh. (im nice)
come to think of it, i think it'll be cool to announce happy birthday in school over the PA system.
HURHUR!
but having a birthday cake in class and the whole class to sing its good enough (:
i simply cannot celebrate my birthday alone one. haha.
must have people around then i feel nice. :D
actually ehhhhh, she wanted to treat me to the sushi place at suntec. HAHA. but mom already bringing me there lah, so cant. haha :D
my birthday eh, spent in a very tiring day lehs.
service, then chingay prac. -_________-
ahahahhahaha :D

think im gonna watch one ep of gong zhu xiao mei before watching coffee prince on teevee!
and of course, study :D

3 days more people! (:

pretty busy these few days with chingay pracs and homework.
tooooo busy to post anything actually. :D
but! i actually finished my homework today (and there isnt chingay prac either) so im here on the computer! (:
school's been pretty fun (its only 2 days since the start of the week, but heck la) and great so far.
still havent got my physics book back from the bio lab yet. haaa :D
i have to figure out how to open the bio lab's door whcich is apparently locked 24/7.
well, except during the practicals of course. GRAH.
which means i have to go all the way down to the general office and get that key, AND climb 3 flights of stairs again.
hahahahahaha, oh wells.

supposed to have PE for the first period today, but Principal decided to have a little talk with us.
shucks can, i wanted to run the 2.4km and lose weight ):
the talk was alright i guess, the motivational clips and stuff was nice. :D
i wonder how many talks Mr Lim actually gives to the students.
HAHAHAHA.
actually, the whole talk just made me think of how near Os are. O_O

new year, new challenges.

my physics experiment was so screwed up.
flame too small = slow boiling of water
damn, it sucks that i cant even complete the whole experiment.
which resulted in not completing the assignment.
and i didnt bring my practical book.
i can even find the damn thing.
somemore it was the end of the week!
what a way to end the week seriously.
and the period after physics SPA was clb.
and you know what we did in CLB?
guess the answers for really lame jokes.
FREAKING WASTE OF TIME PLEASE.
i should have stayed behind to finish up my experiment okay. wth.
aaaand, i left my physics TB in the table drawer in the bio lab.
WHAT THE HECK, HOW AM I SUPPOSE TO FINISH MY HOMEWORK?

and then, the sister left me a text message.
what a way to top off the entire morning.
she really put the icing on the cake okay.
seriously, if you wanna send a message accusing me, you couldnt have sent it in a more better time.

new year, new challenges right?
i just have to learn on these things.
there are definately more challenges to come.
so, it all depends how im gonna face them and what im gonna do.
butttt, by the grace of God everything's gonna be alright. (: yay
and the devil shall go downnnnnnnnnnnnnn cos he sucks.
attacking me in such a time as this.
he's gonna pay for it, im gonna send my angels down at slaughter him.

in everything i do, there's always something there to challenge me.
why should i be afraid of it?
be challenged, and i challenge others.
i fear no one but God.
it all depends if i want to use that challenge as a stepping or stumbling block in my life.
think out of how normal people think, think the way of the supernatural.
God has given me wisdom and strength, talents and gifts for me to use.
why put it aside when i can use it to shine in the area of education?
i dont have to feel all dumb and stupid when i cant do a physics experiment properly.

when i grow up, im gonna buy all the eqipment i need and do all the experiments i want! :D

hm, come to think of it, its been one week since i last blogged.
think im blog less often alrd, theres like an OVERLOAD of schoolwork.
tests are coming up, and we're dealing with stuff like CALCULUS in amath.
but its pretty fun, just that not as much time as before to spend on computers and teevees. (:
but hey, i have a social life too you know.
i dont mug every second of my life, i watch teevee too xD
okay whatever, im off to do homework!

:D

- 8 more days to sweet sixteen!

beaches in thailand are lovely.
i want to go to thailand one day. (:
and bring along a really cool camera to snap pictures with.
credits to this picture: ex zss teacher, ms michelle goh.
thanks! (:

its 15 more days to sweet sixteen.
i just want a nice dinner and nice presents this year.
and nice presents as in stuff i can actually USE.
not like last year, but i shan't elaborate.
i dont wanna complain.
people give presents, i shouldnt be complaining.
if not like so ungrateful. -___-
mother's fulfilling the part about Dinner (and its sushi, babeh! WHOO!)
so alls that left is presents! HINTHINT*
HA. but okay la, i'll like whatever things you'll give me (:
im nice.
i think i need clothes. hurhur.

actually, all i want is to get pretty high points for Os this year.
to reach my goal and get into a good JC.
and go into university, further my studies, get a PhD and be a qualified doctor.
thennnn, save more lives, and get a Nobel Prize for finding a cure for cancer (haha, mag, serena, and arabelle).
buttttttt, must clear the O level obstacle first. :D
see, i actually think out my future.

its saturday today!
i feel wierd not being in service.
haha. my first sat of staying at home.
i miss sat service ):
but O level beckons, so gotta study and mug out.
will be going back on the 19th! (:
(cos jeffrey says he's gonna treat me to dinner at bedok, hoho)
CAKECAKE, I WANT A CAKE. CHOC CAKE! hiahia >:D
whee, see all the saturday service people then!
dont miss me okay. (even though i'll totally understand if you miss me)
:D

okay, parents coming home soon.
gotta get off the computer, supposed to be studying xD
but ... procastinating again la.
okay, better do my homework :D

see you around yea.

congrats to nick who actually finished the rubik's cube.
took this pic in class out of sheer boredom.
last two periods was bio, but two relief teachers stepped in instead.
one of them was NINETEEN. haa :D
i bet he was waiting for his A level results before going to army or something.
soooo, two periods of slacking and not doing anything at all.
actually, its more of like i didnt want to do my emath ws. xD
it was the BOX AND WHISKERS table. LOL.
listened to sarah's cell phone songs all the way.
she has a heck lot of reliant k and hillsongs songs manzx. haha
ask her to send to me and she didnt want to! that poop!

kezia: send me that song la!
sarah: -silent, listening to music.-
kezia: oei oei! -pokes-
sarah: eh? what? you mean you talking to me ah?
kezia: ... yeah la.
sarah: okay, what?
kezia: send me song.
sarah: no.
kezia: -silent-
sarah: -stares at kez.-
kezia: eh, did you just say no?
sarah: yea. HAHA!
kezia: oh, i thought you said yes and then i was waiting for you to send it.
sarah: you dope!

hiahiahia :D
so spastic lah that sarah.
in the end she didnt send me, poop!
i shall make her cos im sitting beside her, HAHAHA! :D
Kezia The Nice prevails once again!
i want to solve the rubik's cube one day, LOL!
i think its fun. (:

had guides today, and oh it was exhausting.
i was dozing off as mrs tan talked about the layout of our thinking day banner.
until she told me i was the artist.
i went like, O_O
but, it was good cos it woke me up.
drew about 5 pictures (just the outlines, though) and was coughing on chalk dust.
thanks to mdm chin who encouraged me (:
i must have more confidence! (well, more than i have now actually)
dont be afraid to step out of your comfort zone, kez (:

soooo, another exhausting day.
dont wanna go for double service this week, so im hoping geraldine will make it for the sunday one. (:
i think im gonna be too tired if i go for both services this week.
will only be going back on the 19th for special reasons, haha :D
mother wants to bring me out to sushi buffet at suntec on 20th for dinner! yayness (:
there's sashimi, woohooooooooooooo :DD

--- /edit.
stupid theresa yee.
i hope you see this.
I WILL NOT GET AN E8.
i'll show you, you idiot.
dont say i go around causing trouble, cos you're the one that started all of it.
I'LL SHOW YOU I WONT GET AN E8 FOR AMATH.
shit, i really hate dislike you. >:(
stop telling me negative stuff will you.
i hate your negative talk, its not even considered a freaking joke.
im not even gonna entertain your crap.
if not just get lost, i dont want to talk to you even if you're my sister!
STUPID NEGATIVE TALK, GET LOST! >:(
dont come and mess with me in the area of my studies, I WILL NOT HESITATE TO SLAP.
and if you wanna shoot back at me, talk to me face to face.
dont go spamming on my tagboard just cos you're not happy.
coward.
i warned you.
--- /edit.

14 more days to birthday :D

and happiness comes in the shape of a lighted spark.

its the second day of school and im feeling tired alrd.
seriously, im been coming homr everyday at 4plus.
its exhuasting just going through all the classes.
but God's strength will be with me! :D
supposed to have a mock emath exam today but it was cancelled, yay.
didnt have time to study for it anyways.
but the test is gonna be next week instead, so yay, there's more time to study for it (:

homework started piling in with the usual "it's your Os this year, you bttr study and stop playing" talks from teachers. haa.
its as if im gonna play like that.
i wanna get 7 pts for L1R5 lehs. how to play?
hahaha.

first lesson we had was CME.
gosh, the most exciting (NOT!) lesson of the day.
(frankly, i dont see the point of having CME except if they want to teach philosophy. then i dont mind, ha)
had to write down our desired O levels results.
what else is new manzxz.
standard ah, every beginning of the year you set your goals.
sometimes i wish the teachers will change once in a while.
it gets boring to write your goals every year.
(although it DOES inspire me to reach my aimed result) haha :D
written down that i wanted 5 A1s and 1 B3 for Os.
i can do itttttttttttttttttt, yay! :D

ms tan was so cool today during history. HIAHIAHIA.
(muigeeeeee, muigeeeeeeee) aiyo, that carlos. >:D
anyways, ms tan got suaned by ben tiong.
eh, ms tan! you take so long to set up the laptop, and then you still cannot. then the guy came in and did it with one click! aiyo, aiyo.
and then halfway through the lesson, ms tan suddenly asked a super random question la!
ms tan: so do you know which country turned the smaller countries around Germany into communist... oh yeah! anyone of you here know who to fold paper cranes?
class: .....
ms tan: hey! im asking a question!
sarah: eh, why suddenly ask this question?
ms tan: why cannot, you all dunno how to fold cranes ah! you all are girls or what! useless ah!
-class laughs-
ben and sarah: then ms tan, we ask you uh. YOU know how to fold paper cranes or not?
ms tan: of course not lah, if not i ask for what!
ben and sarah: ahaha, USELESS!
class and ms tan laughs. :DD

so crazyyyyyy can :D
first history lesson of the year and it rockxxxxxxxxx okay, hiahia.
see, ms may tan is so cool. haaaa :D
she didnt even mind when we make fun of her.
okay, well, she CLAWED ben, but haha! it was free entertainment :D
history rocks kay!

okay, think im gonna go take a nap before doing homework. (:

ahahaha :D
you know what?
i think JOL should have a drama competition this june when we have our yearly zone camp.
it'll be fun (:

i still remembered the other time me, linda, weishan, wenkai, yi ling, micah and andy put up a drama la.
i think we should have won but, its the fun we had that matters right! :D
then we could put up another Lost Sheep drama.
random thoughts la.

i wanna be in the Chc Easter Drama Productions 2008! (:
just like last year. i think i cried pretty well during the cruxification scene.
haha :D

HAPPY NEW YEAR PEOPLE! :D
its a new year, new changes, new friends, new breakthroughs, new levels of spiritual discipline, new lessons to be learnt, new challenges to face, new challenges to make, a new haircut, new stress, new songs, new everything!
i cant wait for it, honestly.

so yeah.
just came back from screaming crazily in the living room where my parents are watching the countdown. hahaha :D
think im gonna grow taller this year. yayness.
oh the changes, changes, changes!

pst tan preached about Change on sunday and i decided (seriously this time :D) that i want to change!
especially for the new year (:

#1 Anger/Short temperedness.
ohhhhhh yes. i wanna change on this.
i tend to get irritated on small little things that piss me off.
like, lateness or undecisiveness.
for example, if person A is late for the first time, i'll probably just brush it off.
a second time, i'll get irritated.
a third time, and i'll scream at that person.
it all builds up after time and i'll get really pissed off.
and yes, my tolerance is pretty low i guess.

thats why i wanna change it manzx! :D
oh, i get angry for favoritism too.
its sickening, i hate it. (unfortunately)

change, kez, change.

#2 Mindset.
i have really got to stop judging people.
like judging rachel and despising others. i wont elaborate, but its something im starting to change on.
i have to stop thinking im more superior (and yes, i do think that way sometimes.) just because im an 'older' member. shucks, i really really dislike that.
yes, im gonna change that this year in 2008! :DD
and change of negative mindset too.
i think i have to stop thinking that "oh, i cant do this, i cant do that. i wont be able to rise up, i cant, i cant."
screw that carnal mindset. im gonna throw that away.
and i think i have to stop being too paranoid too. aiyoh.

renew my mind, Father! (:
day after day.

i cant think of anything else lehs. haa
but actually, just changing the two points above is gonna take immense courage and perseverence.
so yep, just gonna start with those two first.
a happy Kezia gives people Happiness, wheeeeeeee :D

so new year resolutions eh.
haha. i just dont wanna copy homework anymore la.
but i think im gonna break that resolution on the first day of school when i "REFER" to my classmate's amath homework.
shucks man, i really dont like amath.
emath is still okay but amath really screws.
bleahzxzxzx.

i still feel like crying over the whole matter.

pst tan preached about change today.
but its late, and i have to be in school tmrw at 9am.
will blog about the changes i wanna make tmrw i guess! :D

dont wanna be emo manzx.

CINNAMON!

I'm a superhero in disguise so shhh, don't tell my mom. Join the fight against Ben 10!

Kezia } key-zee-ear
kay, kez, keziee, key :)
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